Affirm Who You Are.
Never lose your dignity and always stand in your identity. Desperate times come with the urge to make desperate decisions. It is really hard, in practice, to resist doing a crazy thing so that you can assuage your pain. You may be filled with all sorts of crazy thoughts but you need to stand firm and do the right thing even when it is hard to do the right thing. You can keep in touch with yourself by affirming who you are and reminding yourself of your values when temptations arise.
I am currently going through a break-up and all sorts of thoughts come to my mind. There is a temptation to numb the pain by seeking distractions. I was not ready for the situation because I had built real hopes and dreams with my ex and before this year, I did not even imagine being in the place I am in currently. But life happens. What keeps me sane is knowing who I am, and knowing that in this moment, I need to keep my heart intact for me more than anyone else. Also, in all the drama, I strive to keep my principles despite the temptation to deal with the pain in unspeakable ways. However, if I didn’t know who I am or if I didn’t have any principles on which I stand, I could have completely lost my balance in this time.
I need to add that when you have friends that know you so well, love you for who you are and appreciate your set of values, they will help you to keep in check with who you are too.
I have learnt that whatever the situation, keep moving forward. Keep pursuing your goals everyday regardless of how you feel on the inside.
For the past few months, my relationship was in turmoil. Many times, it bothered me because I never seemed to be able to solve the situation despite my best efforts. This had a big effect on how I felt on the inside and I admit, many times I cried and hurt.
However, I still made the decision everyday to get up and do all my assignments, to keep running my business and doing other work, as well as keep on interacting with other people happily. Even in the difficult time, God gave me the ability to keep encouraging others, to keep loving my friends and family and to keep sharing my heart and letting people into my life.
Life is a rolling ball and you must keep rolling with it. I have learnt that there is still joy to be found in those times when you are low. Nothing in life can be so bad that it completely eliminates every other good thing there is about life. There are still birds that fly and flowers that blossom even in the worst of times. Do not let bitterness overcome you to the point that all of life seems grey and you lose the sense of appreciating the good things that still exist.
The result of keeping on walking in my life has been the successful completion of YALI RLC EA’s leadership program, CDEA-IIDEA incubation program and a writing course with Uganda Faith Writers, among other things. I am not saying these things to boast my profile but to emphasize that when the going is tough, DON’T STOP WALKING, DON’T STOP DOING YOUR BEST, DON’T GIVE UP.
Keep the faith, keep the hope, keep your dreams alive.
Join me to close these short series with a poem in the final part titled “In The Storm’s Heart (3)” on 8th June. Thank you for reading.
Until next time, I will keep you in my heart and mind.
-Keziah Elaine Ayikoru-
NOTE: All images used in this article are downloaded off the internet through random searches and this blog does not claim any ownership of any of them.